Re-learning to LISTEN!
“Wisdom is the reward you get for a lifetime of listening when you would rather have talked.” Mark Twain
Have you thought how much of your free time is devoted to visual-driven activities VS. the time associated to audio-driven ones? No, I mean it: think about it. If you are an average person, your hobbies probably range from Netflix to watching live sports: NFL, NBA, MLB, soccer, hockey, cricket, UFC, etc. There are also TV sitcoms, talk shows, YouTube, Disney+, video games and a whole menu of other visual pleasures (should I say drugs?). Then there is the old taste of going to the movies. There are still even some of us who read for pleasure or go to the theater or live shows.
Furthermore, what nowadays goes viral in social networks are either pictures, memes or videos. They are the virtual “sugar” of our times.
Curiously enough, when talking about professional time (work) we are required, many times, to only listen. Yes, just LISTEN: long phone calls, audio conferences, presentations from your leaders, etc.
I strongly believe that the absolute imbalance between the personal time devoted to visual vs listening activities is correlated to our terrible performance when required to solely listen at our jobs. If we are totally used to guide our minds mainly through the eyes, then it is logical that we feel lost, awkward and uneasy when having to guide ourselves solely by the ears: our main compass is lost. We are just not used to listen, and therefore our attention focuses on the slides on the screen, missing what the presenter is saying. We are attracted to the photos within the Skype chat and whatever stuff is available in our phone and screens… our sole captain is the eye.
Of course, this is a recipe for failure: we are missing crucial information during those key meetings, calls, conversations. What´s to be done? I have three simple yet useful suggestions to improve our listening skills at work:
- Listen to radio shows / opinion programs / podcasts during our free time. Audio-books also work. It is all about re-wiring our brains so they are capable of focusing on audio info only during extended periods of times. Repetition is key to mastery: we need to re-balance visual and audio activity.
- When attending a business meeting, have pen & paper around and take notes. Involving our hands changes the whole equation, deriving in more focus and retention. Ditto for virtual meetings: even typing/transcribing the call helps.
- Try not to interrupt… and I´m not even talking about raising your voice. I am referring to consciously avoid judgments while our interlocutors are talking. The moment our internal voice speaks up, we are not attentively listening. Let’s shut up the internal monologue during those times.
In this XXI century when the vast majority follows the eyes, being capable of following the ears can be a true differentiation. This applies to all of us in the knowledge economy, but particularly to Managers, Leaders, Execs, Coaches, PMs. Let´s re-learn to listen. Yep: as simple as it sounds and as tricky as it is, let´s just LISTEN.
Cheers,
Fernando
PS: The Buggles made a song in 1979 which is almost an omen for these times. Listen below to “Video Killed the Radio Star”…
Photo by Alireza Attari on Unsplash
Foto: Ansias de Libertad (El Perro Doliente) / Photo: Craving for Liberty (The Whining Dog)
ESPAÑOL: tomé estas tristes fotos a principios de año. Las imagenes transmiten muchísimas sensaciones, pero fundamentalmente nos cargan de una inmensa empatía, compasión y misericordia para con el sufriente animal. La Humanidad puede desplegar niveles absurdos de crueldad e ignorancia. Es hora de reconsiderar nuestra relación con todo lo viviente. Todo animal es nuestro hermano, y la Tierra como un todo actúa casi cual Madre para con sus hijos. No al egoísmo. No a nuestro lado oscuro.
“Love is all we need.”
Fernando
ENGLISH: I took these sad photographs recently. The images convey a bundle of feelings, including an immense empathy, true commiseration with the poor animal. As Humanity, our cruelty can reach absurd levels. Its time to reconsider our relationship with the entire biosphere. We are ignoring our brotherhood ties to all living things, and to the Earth as a whole. Say no to egotism. Say no to our dark side.
“Love is all we need.”
Fernando
(Sobre)-excitados / (Over)-excited
VERSION EN ESPAÑOL / ENGLISH VERSION BELOW
Revise la configuración de su monitor, pantalla de teléfono o TV. Es muy probable que el “brightness” (la luminosidad, el brillo), el contraste, el color y otros parámetros de la imagen estén por defecto (o por gusto) configurados a altísimos niveles, inclusive pueden estar al máximo. Ahora téngame paciencia y baje la luminosidad (brillo). Sí, bájela. Sienta el efecto en sus ojos: comfort, descanso, bienestar, relajación… Es posible que inclusive sienta una especie de pequeña “resaca” en el momento mismo de ajustar la imagen: su mente y su vista resienten el cambio, extrañando la sobre-estimulación que han recibido por incontables horas. Pero resistamos a la tentación: déjelo así. Pasados solo unos minutos, Ud. se acostumbra y su vista, sus horas de sueño y su mente se lo agradecerán.
Lo anterior es solo un ejemplo. Esta sobre-estimulación es hoy por hoy un verdadero ataque inmisericorde a los sentidos: una pandemia de 360 grados. Nuestros ojos son acechados por el brillo inclemente de monitores en todas partes, a todas horas. Nuestros oídos sufren el embate constante de audífonos y parlantes a todo volumen. Nuestro paladar es atacado por saborizantes, preservantes, colorantes y azúcar en cantidades industriales. Nuestros cuerpos devoran calorías, químicos y bebidas energéticas a raudales. Nuestras mentes procesan día a día más y más noticias, eventos y publicaciones con titulares amarillistas, “efectistas” y manipuladores. Los videojuegos son cada vez más rápidos, realistas, violentos, envolventes. Corremos revisando relojes que nos cuentan calorías, velocidad, tiempos y hasta el pulso cardíaco. Estamos sobre-excitados, sobre-estimulados, sobre-cargados, sobre-monitoreados… hasta llegar a estar sobremanera sobresaltados: algo que no es de sobreestimar ni está de ninguna manera sobredimensionado…
Más allá del sobre-saliente chiste con que cierro el párrafo anterior :o) creo que debemos reconsiderar seriamente las cosas (iba a decir sobre-ponerse pero el momento del chistorete ya pasó…). La cultura “slow” es una respuesta a esta hecatombe sensorial. Dése un tour por el “Instituto Internacional de No Hacer Mucho” (“International Institute of Not Doing Much“). Exploremos las diferentes posibilidades de esta tendencia: comer despacio. viajar despacio, envejecimiento lento, jardínería slow, cinema slow… hasta sexo slow hay en el menu (!). Alguna de estas opciones calzará con cada quien. Ahem.
“La simplicidad es la máxima sofisticación.” – Leonardo DaVinci
Ya en serio, el punto es sencillo: despacio porque solo tenemos el presente. Se lo garantizo: como lo atestiguamos con el experimento inicial, el solo hecho de bajarle el brillo a nuestra pantalla hace que el mundo real se vea más atractivo, más brillante, más “actual”. Es natural: hay menos contraste entre la realidad y la ficción. Y nos sentimos mejor. Extrapolemos e imaginemos (un saludo a Lennon donde quiera que esté) toda la belleza escondida que resurgirá cuando le bajemos al volumen, al azúcar, a los datos, al diario trajín. Volverá la magia de escuchar el viento. Regresará el privilegio de probar el verdadero sabor de ese alimento. Retornará la paz inherente a un ritmo más humano. Ganaremos mucho cuando perdamos esta sobrecarga de estímulos. Échele un ojo al concepto de “voluntary simplicity” y “downshifting“. Creo que hay algo ahí también para todos.
Les deseo mucha, feliz y sofisticada simplicidad en este 2020 y más allá.
Fernando
“El gran milagro del zen está en la transformación de lo mundano en lo sacro.”
Osho
PD: termino de escribir estas líneas y al releer el último párrafo, recuerdo una escena de la película “Belleza Americana” en donde se observa a una bolsa plástica bailando en el viento. Es un ejemplo del milagro oculto en lo mundano.
PDPD: la mayor parte de las pantallas, computadoras y teléfonos modernos tienen configuraciones para filtrar la luz azul, modos de “protección de la vista” y similares. Hagamos uso de ellos.
ENGLISH VERSION / VERSION EN ESPAÑOL MÁS ARRIBA
Check the configuration of your monitor, phone´s screen or TV. It is quite possible that the brightness, contrast, color and other picture parameters are set by default (or voluntarily) to high levels, perhaps even to the max. Now bear with me and diminish the bright and/or the back-light. Yep, just diminish it. Feel the effect: more comfort, ease, wellness, relaxation… It is even possible that you feel sort of a little “hangover” at the very moment of the adjustment: your mind and your vision are resenting the change, missing the over-stimulation received for countless hours. But let´s resist that initial impulse and leave it as is. A few minutes later, your sight gets used to it. Your sleep time, your health and your entire being will benefit with just this small adjustment – you can thank me later for the tip.
Now the aforementioned is just an example. This stimuli overload is nowadays a merciless attack to our senses: a 360 degrees pandemic. Our eyes are hurt by the light of monitors placed everywhere. Our ears suffer the constant attack of headsets and speakers at high volume. Our taste endures colorants, artificial flavorings, preservatives and industrial quantities of sugar. Our bodies feast on calories, chemicals and energy drinks. Our minds process more and more news, events and posts with biased, sensationalist, pro-management content. Videogames are ever more fast, realistic, catchy. We even run and exercise with watches counting our calories, speed, time and our pulse. We are indeed over-excited, over-stimulated, over-charged, over-measured… up to being over-loaded with an overly oversaturation over and around…
Passing over the over-represented joke, its time to seriously reconsider things. The so-called “slow-culture” is an answer to the stimuli tsunami we live in. I truly recommend for you to tour the International Institute of Not Doing Much. Moreover, let´s explore the varied tendencies across and above this cultural tendency. There is slow eating, slow travel, slow aging, slow gardening, slow cinema… even slow sex (!). Some of these options will resonate with your specific personality. Ahem.
“Simplicity is the ultimate degree of sophistication.” – Leonardo DaVinci
Jokes aside, at the end, there is a single underlying statement: we need to slow down because we only have the present. I guarantee: the sole fact of diminishing the screen brightness makes the world more alive, more attractive, more “real”. Its natural: there is less contrast between reality and fiction. Now lets extrapolate this idea and lets imagine (a wink to Lennon, wherever he is) all the hidden beauty that will re-surge once we lower the volume, the sugar, the data intake, the rush. The magic of feeling the breeze will return. The privilege of truly tasting that food. The peace associated to a more humane cadence. We will win a lot by loosing this stimuli overload. Take a look to the “voluntary simplicity” and “downshifting” concepts. There is also something for all of us there.
I sincerely wish you all lots and lots of happy, sophisticated simplicity in this 2020 and beyond.
Fernando
“The grand miracle of the zen is the transformation of the mundane into the sacred.”
Osho
PS: I am finishing the draft of these post and reading it, I cannot but remember a scene of the movie “American Beauty” in which a plastic bag dances in the wind. Its a nice example of the miracle hidden in the mundane.
PSPS: most screens, phones and PCs have settings that allow blue-light filtering, night mode and other eye protection features. Let´s use them.
Photo by Jorge Franganillo on Unsplash
Foto: Invencible / Photo: Invincible
ESPAÑOL: que la amistad sea siempre como este árbol: tenaz, luchadora, resiliente, capaz de sobreponerse a todo – en una palabra, invencible. Pasen un hermoso 14 de Febrero.
Fernando
ENGLISH: may friendship be always like this tree: though, tenacious, resilient, capable of bearing anything – in a word, invincible. Have a joyful Feb 14th.
Fernando
Foto: El Bailarín / Photo: The Dancer
ESPAÑOL: ya les he contado que me fascinan los árboles que “danzan” en el viento, pero este “amigo” lleva la metáfora a otro nivel… ¿alguien más puede ver la figura humanoide bailando “limbo”? :o)
¡Feliz Viernes!
Fernando
ENGLISH: I have already shared that Im fascinated with trees “dancing” in the wind, but this “friend” takes the metaphor to a whole new level… anyone sees the humanoid figure dancing “limbo”? :o)
Happy Friday!
Fernando
Foto: Oro y Azul / Photo: Gold and Blue
ESPAÑOL: la fuerza del color de estas fotos es simplemente irresistible. Toda una mañana de verano capturada por el lente. Es la mañana, siempre nueva, siempre llena de esperanzas.
ENGLISH: the color´s strength in these shots is irresistible. An entire summer morning captured by the lens. Morning has broken…
